At least the sewers now have plenty of vitamin E.
Vitamin infusions may help really annoying people live even longer it has emerged.
“IV vitamin infusions are widely advertised as providing a powerful energy boost and are seen by many as the ideal solution for combating fatigue, stress, and burnout,” vitamin expert Professor Candid told The Medical Republic.
“But vitamin infusions aren’t full of health, they’re full of nonsense, and if I didn’t have APHRA to worry about I’d recommend bleeding the patient dry and replacing their entire circulating blood volume with Vitamin C!”
Troy, a social influencer and popular TikToker told TMR: “I’m very conscious of my body and I want everyone to be as conscious of my body as I am, so every morning I get up at four and go for a 10km run without any shoes on.
“I then do a bit of wild sea swimming and smash back a kiwi and quinoa smoothie before going to work.”
“I got into vitamin infusions because me skin was a bit dry and I was feeling a little bit tired and it’s been a real game changer!”
Prof Candid told TMR: “Rather annoyingly, vitamin infusions don’t just give you expensive piss, they may also help prolong the life of really annoying people like Troy. I mean if you’re tired all the time, Troy, and your skin feels a bit dry why don’t you just try shutting the f*ck up about it!”
