Code me baby, one more time.
In November up to 75% of practices will revert to 100% bulk billing, and experts agree that more billing codes are required.
Here are some of Professor Candid’s suggestions:
1279: For referring your patient to the holistic “Living Well With Chronic Pain Clinic”, even though you know nothing good will come of it, other than temporary relief for you and a prescription of Lyrica for the patient.
1379: For completing a set of forms sent by the hospital requesting that you organise a full panel of bloods, a liver USS and a top-to-toe clinical examination of your patient just so they can stay on the bariatric clinic waiting list. Bill a supplementary 10997 if this is the sixth time you’ve done it for the same patient.
19988: Use this when referring a borderline personality disordered patient to the DBT group when you know there’s at least an eight-year waiting list. By which time you’ll be safely retired anyway.
199889: For referring the same BPD patient to the local community mental health team when you know full well they’ll punt it back saying they can’t offer anything and have you considered referring your patient to a psychologist or the local DBT group. In fact, this applies to every patient you will ever refer to the local community mental health team.
4153336: Bill this if after 15 minutes of probing questions, facilitative pauses and close listening and you still haven’t got a clue what the patient is talking about. Feeling “quivvery” isn’t a symptom and neither is “jittery”, you idiot, try another word! We’ve only got 10 minutes!
372: To be billed if you’re interrupted by the practice nurse, the care plan co-ordinator, the admin staffer, the practice manager, the registrar, a drug rep, the practice manager’s annoying ring tone and a delivery driver during the same consultation.
439: To be billed if you have to wait on hold for 10 minutes listening to that really depressing, existential crisis-inducing music just to get an authority for Lyrica. You really shouldn’t have referred them to that holistic “living well with chronic pain” clinic.
7767: To be billed if the patient asks you for a medical certificate covering today and tomorrow even though they booked the appointment six weeks ago!
44666: To be billed if a patient brings you a tube with what looks like a piece of hairy spaghetti in it and tells you they pulled it fresh out of their arse that morning.
466362: To be used if the patient asks for the third time this week for a prescription of donepezil because they’ve only gone and lost the other two scripts, Doc!
1001000100011: If you use AI during your consultation.
