So will Mr Hyde, but you won’t find him listed on the AHPRA register.
Gothic horror Jekyll and Hyde clinic finally here, it has emerged.
“The Jekyll and Hyde practice recently opened its doors and looks set to revolutionise the way general practice is delivered,” Medicare expert Professor Candid told The Medical Republic.
“The practice has two separate entrances. Well-heeled patients who can afford to pay a gap fee go through the front entrance and get to see Dr Jekyll.
“He’s described as a tall, well established, smooth faced man of fifty with a kindly and intelligent countenance. He projects an air of health and prosperity and is genuinely fond of his patients.”
“Unfortunately, if you can’t afford a gap fee and rely solely on Medicare then you have to go round the back of the practice where the bins are and see Mr Hyde.
“Patients say he’s a short, twisted, distinctly hairy creature who radiates an aura of deformity and decay.
“He won’t make eye contact with you and will probably throw a prescription at you without any follow up.
“He’s ruthless, devoid of moral conscience and feels no remorse, pity or empathy for any of his patients. In other words he’s a belligerent twat”.
It’s hoped that the Jekyll and Hyde model of care will allow the practice to continue operating in the future.
“Hopefully no-one realises that the two men at the practice are one and the same person” admits Prof Candid.
“That would be morally ruinous.”
More to come.
