Junior docs choosing the wraggle-taggle life

2 minute read

The rental crisis, cost of living and student debts have pushed some trainees on to the road.

Cost-of-living pressures have forced some junior doctors to live in caravans, it has emerged.

“I graduated from medical school three years ago,” Dr Margarita Nikolaevna told TMR, “and while struggling to complete the mandatory 2000 hours of hospital placements I didn’t get any help at all from the government.

“I worked three part-time jobs and left university saddled with monstrous HECS debts and rent arrears because for some reason this Labor government assumes that anyone doing medicine is born with a silver spoon in their mouth, which couldn’t be further from the truth.”

When Dr Nikolaevna was forced to make a choice between attending an Advanced Life Support course and a buying a bottle of shampoo, something had to give.

“I was heading towards a nervous breakdown,” she admitted, “so I took a bit of time out to weigh up my options. That’s when I finally decided to bite the bullet and live off-grid.”

She is now the proud owner of a brightly painted wooden caravan or “vardo” and an old horse called Charlie.

“All Charlie needs is a bucket of feed and a shovel and I don’t even need planning permission because my house is on wheels!

“My hard-earned cash is no longer being eaten up by a heartless landlord or guzzled at the petrol pump and travelling on country roads between hospitals in a caravan decorated with lions and golden griffins is a rewarding experience.”

A Labor spokesperson told TMR: “Suck it up, buttercup.”

Asked to clarify, they said: “The fact that these bourgeois parasites now have to live like gypsies doesn’t really concern us.”

We asked Dr Nikolaevna for her response, but she and Charlie had left town to enjoy the open road.

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