The party is tapping into the cultural Zeitgeist with its latest investment in primary care.
Labor has built an urgent care clinic in Minecraft and staffed it with villagers, it has emerged.
Crafting expert Professor Candid told The Medical Republic: “A Minecraft Movie is a cultural phenomenon: you know something is happening when a normally truculent gang of teenagers shouts ‘Chicken Jockey’ at the screen and throws their popcorn joyously up in to the air. It feels more like a piece of performance art than a movie and Labor has caught the Zeitgeist by promising to build an urgent care centre in Minecraft.”
A Labor spokesperson told TMR: “The Minecraft urgent care centre will operate pretty much like any other UCC. You can visit it at any time of day or night, it’s free to use and the only difference is you’ll be greeted by a villager rather than a receptionist. Oh, and you also have to shout ‘I am Steve’ when you enter the building.”
Labor made its first Minecraft UCC out of wooden blocks but then accidentally burnt it to the ground after crafting a flaming torch from a stick and a lump of coal. It’s rumoured that the final version will be made out of fire-resistant netherite blocks.
“We think Minecraft is a valid way to deliver high-quality health care,” continued the Labor insider. “But to be honest we think every way is a valid way to deliver health care, as long as it’s not delivered by a well qualified GP who’s known you for years and has spent their entire adult life learning medicine.”
Patients visiting the Minecraft UCC are advised to take their Medicare card with them and are being urged not to leave the facility after nightfall in case they bump into a marauding horde of zombies.
